Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.
~ Les Brown ~
I love this quote from Les Brown because not only does it celebrate the joy of success, it also emphasises the importance of progress and effort when it comes to setting and pursuing your personal goals.
The Oxford dictionary's definition of 'goal' is:
noun. the object of a person's ambition or effort; an aim or desired result.
So, to create a goal, you need to have an ambition or something that requires the input of effort. The goal is then the desired result of your effort. Therefore, you might ask, surely you are being rewarded with the attainment of that desired result? Why would you need a further reward?
It's simple, really, achievements are rewards within themselves, but people also need to reward and celebrate their effort.
In Japan, people have a unique way of setting their goals. Daruma dolls are purchased with both eyes unpainted. When you set a personal goal, or a business or company goal, you paint in one eye. This reminds you to work to achieve your goal. Once you have achieved the goal, you paint the other eye as your reward.
Interesting ... but why do we need to set goals in the first place? What's the point?
What's All This Fuss About Goal-Setting?
Anybody born more than forty or so years ago will tell you, 'In my day, we had to earn gratitude. In this day and age, kids think making their bed without being asked makes them a worthy recipient of a medal.' Others might add that 'everything is handed to kids on a plate now'.
There is an element of truth in this feeling. Kids can be seen as less goal-driven because their family provides everything they need and the current thinking is that we need to boost the morale of our kids by cheering them on for doing things that are part of the expectation of family life. Only the other day, I overheard some women talking about the child of a mutual friend who had 'graduated' from childcare — complete with mortarboard hat, gown and a 'degree'. 'Where do they go from there?' one of the women asked. 'All his goals have been achieved.'
Not exactly — it was the reward that had been used up.
Setting goals is crucial if you want to take that first step towards success, whether it is career success or something more personal, like family or personal achievements. If you're yet to be convinced, here are six reasons why goal-setting is, in itself, one of life's essential skills.
Goals:
- help you to focus
- encourage you to keep track of your progress
- keep you motivated
- stop procrastination
- support you to continue achieving
- guide the development of your path in life.
Essentially, the management of the goals you create will set, improve or change, the course of your life.
What Sort of Personal Goals Should I Be Setting?
The younger you are, the harder it is to project yourself far into the future to set your life goals. But the effort is worth it.
There are many different areas in a person's life they may want to improve or start striving towards. These include:
- career
- financial and other matters related to money
- education and skills
- family
- physical and mental health
- personal development (attitude, mindset)
- social
- personal entertainment or enjoyment.
Start by selecting one small part of one area you would like to improve or have dreamed about achieving. Keep it:
- specific or significant
- measurable or meaningful
- attainable or action-oriented
- relevant or rewarding
- trackable or time-bound.
In other words, make it a SMART goal.
Maybe you want to improve your health? Start by setting a goal to make time for a 30-minute walk every day at lunchtime — specific, measurable, action, relevant and time-bound.
Perhaps you dream of writing a book? Set a goal to learn more about character development by enrolling in a short course — significant, meaningful, attainable, relevant and time-bound.
You may really want to go on an expensive island holiday. Start by putting aside a set amount of money each week. Even $20 a week will make a difference — specific, meaningful, attainable, rewarding and trackable.
These are just a few examples of setting big goals but focusing on small, SMART steps — it doesn't matter if your personal goals are based around financial, career, physical health or education, they can all be broken down into manageable, bite-sized mini-goals.
Why Would I Celebrate My Achievements?
There's an almost innate human trait in Australians known as 'tall poppy syndrome'. Basically, the rule is: Do not brag about your achievements. In fact, don't even mention them. Aussies like to barrack for the underdog — if you're a high achiever, forget it. No support for you.
While this might be a slight exaggeration, it is true that many people — men as well as women — shy away from celebrating their achievements publically. 'Bragging' is seen as being in poor taste and a huge no-no in social settings, in the business world or even amongst family.
However, celebrating our personal achievements is good for us, psychologically. If we can say to ourselves, 'Yes, that was hard work and it took a long time but I'm so proud of my progress and for sticking it out,' then we are mentally prepared to do it all over again. This is how we achieve growth and, ultimately, how we achieve our dreams.
The celebration or the reward is all about giving yourself something positive after your hard work. It's about acknowledging the end of the finish line, having a breather and preparing yourself for the next stage of your journey.
Give yourself a pat on the back and say, 'Well done, mate. You're the best.' If you can't say this to yourself, how can you expect other people to say it?
Enjoy your success. Show off your new skills. Remember who you were and what you were like before you set out to achieve this goal and marvel at the difference.
Shout it out to the world — then get on with setting your next goal. You'll be desperate to make a start and have the growth, development and change happening.
Find tips for setting goals before heading back to school on Superprof.
How Can I Reward My Efforts?
Okay, you've convinced yourself you deserve a reward after achieving your goal.
Well done!
Now, what should this reward be?
There is a growing culture amongst the contemporary Australian family to 'reward' their kids for achieving a goal. However, if you're a student yourself, ask whether you truly believe that it would be reasonable to ask your family to foot the bill for a reward for something you've achieved that benefits you.
Whether or not your family is prepared and able to provide your reward, perhaps keep in mind these four pointers when deciding on the type of reward that will be meaningful for you:
- Are the rewards spaced out enough to make them seem easy to attain but not too easy?
- Does the 'size' of your reward match the 'size' of the goal you achieved?
- Does the reward match the goal, or contradict it? Rewarding yourself for a month of healthy eating with a huge chocolate cake may not be the best idea.
- Is the reward effective? Does it motivate you to keep going?
The best rewards or celebrations of your achievements are the ones that are worth waiting for, the ones you will remember, the ones that match the reason you received them, the ones that motivate you to strive for the next reward and, the ones that represent money well spent.
Make a list of ways you can reward yourself. Determine which rewards go with which goals. Keep it nearby. Refer to it often.
You'll have your own ideas but here are a few reward examples to give you a start:
- a favourite meal
- a day off to do something you love
- an activity you've always wanted to try
- a weekend getaway to somewhere you've never been
- a night off doing your 'jobs'
- control of the remote for an evening.
Whatever you choose, you have to feel satisfied that it matches the work you've done, your progress, development and personal growth.
Your reward should acknowledge what you've done, the effort you've put in and your achievements. It should make you proud and it should motivate you to keep going — not for the next reward but for the positive feelings the sense of achievement brings.
Above all, your reward should convince your brain to associate pleasure with skills development, progress and success.
You can only build on success.
~ Tony Robbins ~
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